Are off-putting, approachable, manly, turn-ons, unattractive, brave, disgusting, desirable, trashy, wife-material, wild, down-to-earth, secretly lesbian, one-of-the-guys, broke, hot, drunks, faking it… really?
This past Sunday evening, I was somehow talked into joining Try and his friends for a game of poker – an STT, to be exact. OK… so I willingly went, but only because I miss playing poker offline. Anyhow, from the sound of it, Try had told his buds that we were bringing along a friend, which they probably interpreted as “male friend” – and even if he told them my name, they’d still think I was a guy – because when it was time to get the drinks going round, one character called Ace (who I assumed was the host) apologised, zealously for that matter, as the only beverage being served was *drum-roll* BEER. I replied, “That’s OK”, smiled, grabbed a cold one and posted blind while a debate – where the adjectives as mentioned earlier were thrown around – brewed.
Maybe it’s because it’s liquid bread – women are known for their love-hate relationship with carbs – or the fact that it’s associated with trucker cap-wearing pot-bellied men with plumber pants. Still, girls who consume it are always and undoubtedly gawked at… The same goes for men who have an affinity for so-called “pink drinks”, but that’s another post.
“Sorry, I still can’t believe you finished a whole beer and you’re getting another one,” Alf said as I put down my first beer.
Ace’s spirited apology should have prepared me for his opinion on the matter.”Well, it all depends on what beer it is and what she’s using to drink it. A girl that drinks like Amstel, Heineken, Peroni and stuff is OK, but [milk] stout and [Carling] Black Label is like hard-core, man. Nah, man, she’d probably beat me up. Same for a chic that drinks from the bottle or a quart.”
Then there was Paul, the token Pom. “Half a pint is cool, yeah. A full pint means she’s trying to be a man, but two half pints is cool.” That doesn’t make sense since a whole pint is cheaper. “Well, I’m paying, and those girly drinks are bloody expensive, mate. Beer is cheap, so I can always take her out.” I figured that Paul was just intimidated by a girl with a pint.
“Girls who drink beer know a bit more about what they like to drink than the ones who drink them pink drinks. They are sexier, more confident, fun and independent than, say, the girl sitting at the bar pounding back margaritas for no other reason than to get crunk.” That was Joey, who I think is confused. Maybe girls drink beer because they like it, and anyone can get crunk on a beer mission – it may take longer, but it works – and a margarita is not a pink drink.
“Well, fellas,” finally, Try’s turn, “think about it… Girls who drink beer aren’t offended by the multitude of sexual innuendos and jokes that are inevitable when we guys get together and drink, aren’t you C? You can party with her and get garage pies or McD’s at 3 am.” No comment.
“Then there’s the belching…” What? It comes with the territory. “And what about your love life?” Ace. Just. Had. To. Go. There. I went all in.
Well, guys indeed say they want to date someone who drinks or can drink beer, but they hardly ever do, and the ones that do tend to ask you not to do it when his friends are around *Ava knows all about that – Sang*. The downside is that you’ll likely be friend-zoned, even if they say you’re likeable and fun. The other nightmare is that the guy you’re secretly crushing on is hitting on a Cosmo drinker only because you’re with your guy pals – since your gal pals would rather die than be out with you drinking beer- and he usually thinks you’re doing one of the guys you’re with… *Sometimes, I like to think he’s thinking he doesn’t have what it takes to hang with me, so that’s why he’s going for Ms Cosmo.. but yeah, just a dream – Ava*
This whole beer-drinking girl stigma even has women meeting up in secret, practising and giving each other advice on how not to look trashy when drinking beer… I kid you not; I saw it advertised in a forum. There is no other way to drink beer than to drink and savour each sip. SJL tried it in wine glasses and felt weird. The only trashy thing is a drunken mess – man or woman. So, drink what you want. If you want an apple Martini, have one. If you wish to have a draught, then have one too. There’s no point in ordering something and wondering if you’ll come off as attractive.
Besides, we all know beer’s taste that stood the test of time.
Prost!
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